ARCANA Chapter 15 by William James Johnson

The throbbing energy field irradiated the small group of earthlings at the spheredrome launching site. Eager to learn as much as they could about the Monad transportation methods, they were willing to risk energy burns in their quest for a method of returning to earth. The constant humming of the main generator was analogous to the beating of their own hearts. They believed that the unending magnetic field which emanated from the pale green internal sun was in actuality the physical form taken by IAM. Contrary to experiencing burning in the presence of this energy, each felt a surge of power greater than they had ever enjoyed before. Truly, the Monads had discovered the mythical fountain of youth in their many uses of geomagnetic forces.

"What produces this tremendous feeling of well-being?" asked John of his tall Monad companion, Stellar.

"Orientation. A focus beam realigns the electrical component of your molecules and you feel this great surge when your own magnetic field is oriented with that of the master magnetic source."

"You make it all sound so mechanical."

"It is mechanical, except for that part of your being which IAM made spiritual. If the spirit corresponds with the law of IAM, it's easier to realign the material. It's when there's no conjunction of these two components that your energy source is depleted."

"But how does man know if he has his spirit in tune with IAM's law?"

"It feels right...that's the simplest way I can express it. We all have this instinct for right action. That's the way IAM intended it to be, but circumstances make us doubt, and we get further and further away from the truth of our nature.

"Here in the Domain there are no examples of truth doubters, hence we are always in tune with IAM's universal law. Making use of the magnetic force is making use of the grace of our Creator. He made it for us, and he made us for himself."

"Stellar, do you think this rule could ever work on earth?"

"I doubt it. Your world is too full of contradictions. Man is not able to discern what is the truth when he exists in a society which permits the ends to justify the means. You live in a world of contingency. Whatever works for the moment is the truth even if it is based on falsehood. Take for instance your presence here with me. You're not here to learn about the basic philosophy which underlies life in the Domain. You're feigning interest in the hope that I might reveal something about our method of transportation which will help you return to earth."

"That's ridiculous. I want to know as much as I can about life in the Domain so that I can tell my world about you."

"Contingency answer. This is exactly what I have been speaking about. You're not prepared to accept the truth."

John knew he was right. He was ashamed he had reverted to acting like a scheming earthling. The others in his small party who had been listening intently to this exchange also felt the same embarrassment. They were just as eager as John to get any information which might aid them in their escape.

"Okay Stellar, I'll admit you're right about my reason for coming here. Is that so wrong?"

"Not at all. But would it not have been better to speak the truth in the beginning."

"You're right. You're always right. I just don't know how it is you Monads know what we're going to say before we say it."

"First of all you have to realize we don't use speech among ourselves. It's not efficient. Monads communicate through thought transference. This is no great achievement when you consider that we're all in tune with the truth. Monads believe truth is in nature. To comprehend this, one need only get his life into harmony with the natural law. This is how one acquires wisdom. The great contemplative saints of your world unite with God by realizing this truth."

"In answer to your question about how we know what you're going to say before you say it, we're in contact with your mind. Your spoken words begin as thoughts. We know what you're about to say even before you know yourself. This is one of the reasons Monads developed this form of communication. We believe thought contains truth, but many times, words contain distortions."

"Will you tell us how you are transported to earth?"

"Yes, I will, but you must know that what I will tell you will be of no use in your own return."

"Why not?"

"Because the methods used by Monads cannot be used by earthlings."

"I don't understand."

"You are dense creatures with internal organs and biologic needs. Monads are aethriscopic. We are capable of measuring minute variations of temperature due to different environmental conditions. It is this inherent ability to adapt continuously which makes it possible to transmit our beings in the higher levels of the energy spectrum."

"Wait a minute, Stellar. You're getting too technical for me. Can you start over?"

"Let me explain it this way. I want you to think of your centre of government in Washington. Do it now and see all the things you remember about it."

"Okay, whatever you say. I see the White House...the Oval office with Gerald Thorpe sitting in President Koster's place. So what does all this prove?"

"If you were a Monad, you would actually be there with that instantaneous presence provided by your thought."

"Thought transfer...you mean you can be anywhere, be anything, by merely thinking about it?"

"Precisely. It's not so difficult when you accept the fact that all energy is one and comes from one source, IAM. It is this unity of structure which makes us stop seeing ourselves as independent entities and act with the power which comes from the unification of the whole."

Sandra had been enthralled by all of Stellar's theories and this wholeness theory intrigued her even more.

"What you really are saying Stellar, is that we're all a part of everything else that exists."

"That's right. But man has been given an individual consciousness by IAM. This isolates him from his Creator. Through an act of his free will he must direct his life towards the loss of this single identity, and reunite himself with the cosmic consciousness of total being. When this occurs of course, man is no longer man; he is now returned to the body of IAM."

"That's fascinating, Stellar. Do you think earthlings can comprehend this truth?" asked Sandra.

"Not in their present spiritual condition. But who knows, you may change all of that when you return."

"I'm glad you said when we return and not if we return," said John.

"I'd like to ask you more about your use of the blue spheres, if you don't mind," commented André.

"Certainly. What would you like to know?"

"If you're capable of thought transporting, why do you use the blue spheres?"

"We use them the same way we used the Monad crew which returned to earth with your airship. Monads exist in spirit throughout your world. When it becomes necessary for us to make our presence known, we adopt whatever form is most suitable. We have been showing ourselves from time to time as unidentified flying objects, because man carries in his soul the instinct that his God speaks to him from on high, and the so called UFO phenomena is IAM's way of telling earth creatures they are exceeding his tolerance."

"Why not just appear to man and give it to him straight. Shape up, or ship out."

"Colourful language John. Man is too cynical. No matter what IAM chooses to do, because of man's untruth..."

"You mean his sin?"

"Call it sin if it helps you to understand. Sin separates man from IAM. The creature, separates himself from his creator, by rejecting the truth of his creator."

"But surely, IAM could change all that. You've said over and over again IAM is the maker of all things."

"Yes...but you must remember that truth is a unity. In IAM's creation everything was made true from the beginning. IAM would not change this truth."

"Then there is something he cannot do. You said he cannot change what he has made."

"No. I said IAM would not change this truth. Not as you have said, that IAM could not change the truth."

"Then truth is unchanging?" asked Sandra.

"Truth is unchanging. That is the nature of truth, and that is the truth of nature."

André was still curious about the use of the sphere. "Stellar, please tell us how you managed to capture President Koster and bring him here without harming him."

"Long before earthlings went into outer space, Monad scientists launched a sphere-directing satellite over the polar regions. Inside the satellite are moveable panels which permit our launch teams to select any place on earth as a target for our manifestation in the form of a blue globe. We use a method of triangulation with the apex of the triangle being the external satellite, the base of the triangle made up of our location in the Domain and the target on the surface of the earth. An intense beam of focused magnetic energy is aimed at the satellite and the directional panels bounce the beam back to the precise location on the surface. The Spherenauts and their globe are transported on this intense beam at the speed of light."

"And it was this blue sphere which was seen in Washington when the President disappeared?"

"That's right. I was the one who brought him to the Domain."

"On a beam of light?"

"That's one way of putting it."

"Well, was he on a beam of light or not?"

Stellar knew it was most difficult to explain to the limited minds of these earthlings the marvellous wonders which had been given to the Monads by IAM. Using their language hampered his ability to make understandable the mysteries of the universe.

"You all know that Monads can make any material form we choose by our understanding of the true source of all existence. It is also true that we can convert into energy any material substance we select. Your President Koster was converted into spirit light and conveyed to the Domain as a finite accumulation of energy potential. Once he was here, and I might add his transference was instantaneous, he was given the material form he had while on earth. We believe that this transmutation of man will be the one and only way he will be able to successfully voyage throughout the universe."

"Then why can't you transfer us to earth instantaneously?" asked John.

"IAM has said he would not hinder your return to earth, but he has also said he will not help you. This you must do by yourselves."

"Would you try to stop us if we went into your launch zone and used your technology to return ourselves on a light beam like you have described?"

"I would stop you because of the danger that you might annihilate yourselves using our methods which are not the methods of earth. Please John, do not taunt IAM. He says you can leave. Then leave."

"But how?...where?. What direction is out?"

"In a sphere, all directions lead out. You need only select one course and walk straight. Given enough time, you may return to earth."

"But the magnetic field...won't it dematerialize us when we try to go through it?"

"Not as long as you are in contact with the surface. The density of the earth dissipates the force of the field on your small body mass."

"You mean men could actually penetrate the Domain if they came on foot instead of by air?"

"Only if they did not bunch together in a large material mass. The magnetic field acts upon the molecular structure of substance. The less dense the substance, the less is the affect of the energy field. As to your speculation about man being able to wander into the Domain unchallenged, even if he could get by the problems of dematerialization, he still would have to get past the Warrior Beasts who surround the opening."

"What Warrior Beasts?"

"We in the Domain call them Warbies. You didn't see them when you came to the Domain because we brought you down through the centre with your craft. On the perimeter of the opening is a race of primitive subhuman creatures who are not intelligent enough to know about the Domain and who have remained in an arrested state of development since the beginning. When IAM made the world, he made all life, and all forms of existence. Some of the early forms with millions of years of evolution became Monads who have returned to IAM, but there were also the most despicable of creatures who deserve their abominable lives in the nether world between the Domain and Earth. You will not find it easy to get past the Warbies."

"Tell us what to expect," demanded Sandra. "What do they do that is so horrible? Why do you think they pose such a threat to us?"

"The Warbies are massive hunks of hairy flesh who torture their captives before eating the remains. When they can't capture outsiders, they exploit the weakest of their own, thus remaining a strong, primeval creature with the ultimate in survival instincts."

"What kind of tortures?" asked André.

"These perverse creatures enjoy only two activities, feeding on their victims, and sexual abuse. It's believed the hairy musk ox is the result of the mating of Warbies with other animals when there were no humans to ravish."

"Is there anyway to avoid them?

"Only by flying over them. But you have nothing to fly."

"Would IAM stop us from making ourselves a balloon?"

"IAM will not stop you from doing anything. I would say that if you are determined to leave the Domain, you must prepare well, or you will never make it back to the surface."

"But it's only the Warbies we have to worry about, and if we can get over them, we're home free."

"It is more involved than that John. The terrain on the edge of the Domain is made up of razor sharp rock formations which make it almost impossible to progress without risking fatal injury. These are very high in some areas and this impenetrable zone is only the beginning of your physical problems. There are the bubbling sulphur streams which pollute the air for miles into the inner atmosphere. You may make it through this area but your lungs would be crippled for life."

"I can't believe all this nonsense," said John. "This is another of your Monad tricks to get us to stay. To protect your own necks. None of those things is true."

"I'm sorry you said that John. I told you if you asked me any question, I would tell you the truth. Getting out of the Domain is almost as difficult as getting in. I have told you only a few of the obstacles, now you must decide what you will do."

Tuma had not asked any questions during all of Stellar's explanations. He was sure if they could come out in the Arctic, he could get them back to civilization.

"When we finally get out of earth, will we be in my homeland in Arctic?"

"That depends."

"On what?" asked John.

"On the direction you choose."

"Have we a choice?"

"Certainly, but that will be for you to discover."

For a moment John felt a slight twinge of optimism. "You mean there actually might be a way of making it?"

"Everything is possible."

"Who can help us? Please tell me, Stellar."

"Ask the ancient one who lives in the Abode of Photar."

"Where is this place?"

"In the valley of light, beyond the sphere of the Abode of IAM. The ancient one has been in the Domain from the beginning of time. He knows the only safe route for your return to the surface."

"Is there anything else you can tell us which might help us?"

"I have said all I can say now. I must leave. Your government is reconsidering using their neutron bomb on man and IAM has decided we must give them another choice."

After saying this, the tall, handsome Monad entered the spherenaut launching zone and stood majestically on a silver disc which radiated jagged sparks of electrical energy. The throbbing of the magnetic field intensified until great shock waves rolled toward the earthlings and they dropped to the ground to protect themselves.

A brilliant beam of blue streaks shot out from the centre of the disc and cut through the pale green sky of the Domain to some distant sphere in outer space. At this very moment Stellar was in the Washington area, driving the radar operators crazy with his intermittent signals on their apple green screens.

Preparations for their escape from the Domain took years of earth time. John and André looked desperately for alternative methods to plot a course out of this realm. Earth navigational instruments in the Domain were useless since they depended either on astral information or magnetic sensors .

Together they studied the complex drawings which were provided when they told Mehnra they wanted to go to the Abode of Photar to seek the help of the ancient man. Monads knew how to get there because of their instinctive knowledge of all things pertaining to the Domain, but the detailed drawings were of little help to the troubled earthlings.

"If only we could get one of them to come with us."

"Impossible mon ami. We are fortunate they do not interfere with us. IAM has said we must do this for ourselves. They can tell us what we ask them, but they can't take part in our escape."

"Good word...escape. I feel the same way. We're prisoners as long as we remain. We've got to find the way to the ancient man. Let's ask Mehnra. He's always helped us before."

He was called on the personal pager present in each of the villas and came as soon as he was summoned. His AGC landed in the courtyard. Their first friend in the Domain came towards them, already aware of their questions.

"You can begin your journey to the ancient man on an AGC but you cannot go all the way to the Abode of Photar on that vehicle."

"Why not?"

"Photar is in the Valley of Light and the radiant energy sent out by the physical structures in that area will interfere with the anti-gravity function of your vehicle."

No one was surprised that Mehnra knew, before they said anything, what it was they were going to ask him. The earthlings were gradually beginning to accept the fact that the Monads were far superior to themselves, and as André said, they were fortunate these creatures were benevolent.

"Is there much risk involved in entering the Valley of Light?" asked André, particularly concerned after the vivid description of the hazards told them by Stellar.

"The greatest risk is that you may sustain blindness if exposed to the light for too long a time."

"How long is too long?"

"This I cannot answer, because it would not make any sense to you."

"Try me," said John sarcastically.

"As you are well aware by now, earth time and Domain time are two different concepts. On earth your time is related to celestial motion. In the Domain, we measure time by the amount of energy absorbed or given off in any experience. To go back to what I said about blindness and exposure to the Valley of Light, I would be measuring time in the number of photons you absorb during your visit to the ancient man."

"Is there any way we can measure the amount of our exposure?"

"Yes, there is. I will let you use my portable photonometer and caution you to stay below ten microns of the speed of light."

"That's it...that's all there is to it?"

"You should also wear a special head gear which has extremely narrow slits for the eyes. The slits will not be seen by you until you look through the helmet when you come into the valley of light."

Sandra wanted to know more about protective gear, but John interrupted her.

"You're not coming Sandra. You and Tuma are going to wait for us here."

"That's not fair. What happens if you are shown a way out of the Domain by the ancient man and we're stuck back here."

"Sandra right," said Tuma. "We all go, or no one go."

"What do you think, André?"

"I think they're right. We all go or no one goes."

"Okay, Mehnra, what else are we going to need?"

"I would suggest a laser cone to ward off the poisonous vipers which are in the tarry waters that surround the ancient man's cave. You will have to find a way to cross this fiery pool. Take special care. There are hidden undercurrents that can draw you to the depths and that will be the end of your return to earth."

"And the laser cone, how do you use it?"

"It has reduced power so that it does not kill the snakes. IAM does not believe in taking life. It stuns them so that you can continue on your way. But they are clever these reptiles. They are capable of changing their form just as we Monads do, and they may offer to help you just so they can trap you."

"My God, is there no end to the torments of this ill begotten land."

"Life in the Domain and the worship of IAM is as good as it is going to get. Everything else is a perversion of his love."

"And the ancient man...?"

"You will find out when you get there."

Several quantum of energy time were used in acquiring the equipment suggested by Mehnra. As the period came for them to launch their AGC, their friends from the Nobile and President David Koster came to wish them success in the start of their journey home.

"I wish to thank you again for risking everything in your mission to find me. I hope you can understand why I want to remain in the Domain. Believe me, it is not just for selfish reasons. If you should wish to change your minds and stay with us I assure you, I would not think any less of you."

Koster spoke with great sincerity and emotion. He knew better than this small party some of the horrendous adventures they were going to encounter. He had become a true Monad, and shared in their knowledge of the total Domain. He had kept this information from the earthlings because he did not want the fact that he had made this commitment to influence their decision.

"I have no regrets about what we did, David, nor do I look forward to our return with any less determination. You know why we are doing this. I only hope we make it."

"It will not be easy when you get back. I wouldn't be surprised if you all end up in padded accommodation for the rest of your lives. But whatever happens, I wish you the best in your mission."

"Reminds me of our trip to Norway," said Carlo.

"It does at that...and that one ended at Kalmar Sund," recalled John as he gave his former commander a firm embrace.

"If anyone can do it, I know you can. Godspeed, dear friends," said Carlo, embracing each one in turn.

"Thank you all for the exciting experience of getting to the Domain. Keep us in your thoughts and prayers," said John.

He led his small party onto the centre of the AGC. The steady low humming of the energizer, in the base of the disc, increased as he lifted off the grassed area in front of their villa. Smoothly the shining plate headed for the Abode of IAM, the starting point in their journey to the valley of light.

"I can't believe what a marvellous place this is. Look at how the green sparkles like fresh paint, and the flowers and huge oak trees border the gentle hills," said John.

"Then why are we leaving it all behind?" asked Sandra.

"Because Arcana is too important to keep to ourselves. I really think that if we can convince the world there really is a God and that living according to his law can change earth into Paradise, we can make a tremendous difference."

"You really believe that?" asked Sandra.

"I'm ready to bet my life on it...why? Have you changed your mind?"

"Not really. It's just..."

"Well, say it, for God's sake. This is no time for us to hold back how we really feel about this mission."

André and Tuma kept out of this private discussion. The small size of the AGC did not give them much room to separate themselves from the soul searching of their two friends.

"Do you have doubts too, André?...and Tuma. What about it?"

"John, I admire what it is you want to do, but quite frankly my friend, I am scared to death," replied the French scientist.

"And Tuma?"

"Tuma say he come...Tuma come. Like my friend André, Tuma too feel scared. But we go together."

"Well I must say, it's not exactly what I would call a vote of confidence."

"Please John, be patient with us. Down deep, I'm sure you too feel some fear," said Sandra.

"Of course. I'm human too you know."

On the horizon they could see the glistening dome of the Abode of IAM. The shimmering beaten gold of the pyramid radiated a pattern of light into the heavens above this sacred place. They remembered the magnificent jewelled dome when they had their audience with the Creator of All Things.

To the far left of this holy city they saw, on the edge of the land between the sky and ground, the first range of hills they would encounter. The diagrams and the description by Mehnra told them they must go beyond two ranges of highlands. If they kept on aiming for the man-like mountain, they would know they were correct in their heading to the Abode of Photar. Mehnra promised them, once they had flown over this particular rock formation, they would see the special light which came up from the pool of Photar.

Their small craft glided smoothly over the jagged terrain below, and the further they got from the Abode of IAM, the more rugged became the landscape. The former beautiful greenery gave way to gnarled greyish twists of dried tree forms and the colour of the water in the streams and ponds no longer reflected the lustrous pale green of the interior sun, but now appeared to have the wrinkled surface of scablike vegetation.

When they passed the first range of hills, they all searched the dark vista before them looking for the man-like structure which would lead them on to the Valley of Light. It was nowhere to be seen.

"What the hell was he talking about. I don't see any man-like mountains. What do we do now?" asked John hoping against hope they weren't lost so soon in their journey.

"At least we don't have to worry about our AGC running out of fuel," said André.

"Mehnra said that when we reached the Valley of Light we wouldn't be able to use our craft anymore. That could be one way of knowing we are there."

"Stop babbling André. We all know that. What I want to know, is where the hell that landmark is, so we can continue. God I wish we could've used a compass or something civilized like that."

Sandra and Tuma continued to study the horizon for clues. Behind John, in the lavender haze in the distance, she suddenly saw what they were looking for.

"There...over there." She pointed, certain now that she was right.

"See, John. It looks like a human-form standing with its arm on its hip."

"Yes...I see it too," said John. "Good girl, Sandy."

"Now aren't you glad you decided to take me?"

He didn't reply to her playful taunt but smiled at his small crew as their shiny disc headed for the man-like mountain.

It was further than it seemed at first. As they drew closer, the form of the man disappeared and became what it had always been, large boulders on the top of a huge rock formation. No wonder Mehnra told them to spot this land fix while over the last mountain range. They would never have been able to recognize it up close.

As the AGC rose over the lip of the check point, they were all suddenly alarmed to see an intense brilliance surrounded by the final range of mountains they would encounter before the Valley of Light. This was the ring of hills which outlined the glowing sky pattern of intense brightness shining from the Abode of Photar.

As their craft moved silently towards this illumined scene John told the crew to pull on the light shielding masks they had been given by Mehnra. At first, everything was black, and the air tasted like burning, carbon rods. They moved closer to the ring of hills. The cracks in their masks started to let in the sparkling streams of light that came up from the phosphorescent floor of the valley.

Without warning their AGC swung madly in a wide arc towards the rocky face of jutting granite on the top of a hill that circled the valley. John pulled back on the control stick, narrowly missing the cutting edge of the crag. A short distance beyond the peak was a small clearing covered in rock shards. Skilfully he brought their tiny disc to a landing .

"Whew! I don't need anymore of that."

"Well done, John," said André. "It's just like Mehnra said. The Valley of Light somehow interferes with the control of the AGC"

"It sure does. One thing I have to say about Mehnra, he gives you straight answers when you need them."

"What do you want us to do now, John?" asked Sandra.

"Let's get this gear off the AGC, and for gods sake, keep an eye out for snakes.Wow! What stinks?"

The odour of putrescence rising up from the Valley of Light filled their nostrils with the stench of rotting flesh. The gangrenous fumes burned the air passages and stuck in the back of the throat like the memory of the first time one comes upon a decaying animal.

"What a horrible smell," said John, choking as he spoke.

"He forgot to tell us about this," said Sandra.

In the soupy glow of the pool of light, they could see the occasional limb of some creature breaking the bubbling scum, and sinking again below the sparkling slime. A head bobbed on the surface for a brief moment and belched forth the sour offal of past decay, shrieking in high pitched agony, curses of the damned.

Rising up out of the tarry blackness, two naked bodies, locked in mortal combat, ripped chunks of flesh from each other and returned to the inky pool. Throughout the vast simmering lake anguished screaming cut through the brilliant light cascading off their burning bodies. The searing light came from the white hot fire of burning souls, suffering for all eternity, never to be completely consumed.

"This is Hell...it's got to be. No wonder he didn't tell us about it."

"What are we going to do now, John?"

"Give me time to think. That ancient man's out there, somewhere, in all that decay, That stinking corruption. How're we going to find him?"

Cautiously they picked a spot on the shoreline to rest before venturing further. The odour coming from the pond of light was that stringent sharpness which is produced when tar reaches a certain temperature. Mixed with the odour of decomposing organic debris, the air surrounding the massive pool made the earthlings yearn to return to their friends in the Domain.

"It's not too late...we can turn back if you want to," said John, hoping down deep they would insist on giving up this insane plan.

"I think we should go back," said André. "Maybe there's another way. We've got the rest of eternity to solve this one, why must we do it now?"

"What about it Sandra...do you want to go back too?"

"Oh yes, John. Let's go back before it's too late."

"Tuma do what you want him to do."

"Well I guess that's it. At least we don't have to risk going out on that godforsaken pool. Grab your stuff and let's get back to our AGC."

The climb back up the jagged hills which surrounded the pool enervated the struggling earthlings and their deep breathing filled their lungs with the abominable stench that was everywhere. André could not take anymore of it. Stooped over, his body feeling the pain of anoxia, he began to vomit the black juices which had accumulated in this short span of time.

"Go on...go on. I'll catch up as soon as I get rid of this...aw..ga... Oh I'm sick. I'm really sick, John."

It poured out of him colouring the rocks with a tarry slime and bits of whatever else was in there. His retching increased until he was soon doubled up on the ground in agonizing pain.

John rushed to his suffering friend and knelt beside him, trying to comfort André.

"Put your arm around my shoulder. I'll get you out of here. I promise."

Tuma got on the other side of his friend and the three of them struggled up the steep slope. Sandra had gone on ahead, trying to get into an area of better air, before she, too had to give in to the horrible stench that crept up the rocks behind them.

As she reached the place where they had landed, she began to panic. The AGC was no longer there. In its place was a huge multicoloured snake coiled on the spot where they had left their vehicle. She ran back to the edge of the cliff and yelled down at the others.

"It's gone, John!"

"What's gone?" He yelled back, exhausted by the strain of carrying his friend.

"The AGC...it's not here!"

"Tuma, stay with André. I'll go and take a look. It's no use going to the top if we haven't any AGC. Let's lay him down here where he can rest. I'll be right back."

At the top, Sandra was sitting on the edge, her head buried in her hands.

"We should never have left the Domain. Oh Johnny! I'm so scared."

He grabbed her in his arms and held her tightly, feeling her heaving breasts as she sobbed quietly against him. He said nothing. There was nothing he could say that would make it better.

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